Matters of Life

The first week is always the hardest. Getting used to being alone again, the constant nagging and yelling. Going from being treated like an adult to being treated like you're five. Going from being someone that you want around to being an inconvenience. The constant nit picking. The realization that hits me everytime that I realize I will never be liek your son, that I will never be good enough and that I will always be a disappointment. That I will never be good enough in your eyes. The fact that no matter if something happens to me it's no big deal but if something happens to him, the world will come to complete stop. You say I have to give a little, I'm giving so much. You're not giving at all. As much as it hurts to say this some times I wish I wasn't here.