Back to the Basics

I just want to go back. Back to the time where I was all smiles. The time where I was constantly worrying about my health or if something else was going to go wrong. The time where I was healthy and people weren't constantly asking me if I was feeling okay. I just want to go back. Back to when I actually cared. Just bring me back..

I'm sorry you got stuck with a daughter as screwed up as me. I'm sorry that no matter what I do, nothing I do is right. I'm sorry I can't be the picture perfect person that you want be to be. I'm sorry you got stuck with me.

Just Another Dead End..

What do when you meet someone that's off limits?  Even though he seems like he could be so perfect for you. He loves math, he's studying to be a math teacher just like you. He love country music. He'd move to Tennessee in a heart beat. He's more than what meets the eye. He has a sense of humor but it's not over board. He can make you laugh or smile without even trying. He gives you hope that there might be someone out there for you and he might just be it. He makes you want to try. He interests you in more ways than one. He makes you want to find out more. You find yourself smiling at the mention of his name.  But you push him to the back of your mind because your best friend saw him first. And even though they don't seem to have a lot in common, you're not going to cross that line. So you push away the possibility of more than a friendship with a guy that could probably make you more happy than you've ever been. Better luck next time?

That feeling of knowing that no matter when you do he's still not going to want you like you want him. Those feelings that you have for him, that you try to keep buried deep down, come out when you see him. It's even worse when you see him and his arm is around her and you see the look in his eye that he has for her. You know he is never going to look at you like that. But would give anything for him to look at you like that just once.

I can't even say I love you because we've never dated, but this feeling I have for you is so strong. I can't help it. As much as I try to ignore it and move on, it just gets worse. I want to forget you but something pulls at me. Because forgetting you means letting you go, I want to let you go but at the same time I want you so bad my insides hurt. How is it possible for one single individual to have this effect on me? How is it that I feel so much for you and you feel nothing for me? Why can't I just let you go?