I'm sick of the yelling, especially since I didn't do anything wrong. The dishes in the sink that I left there, didn't clean or put in the dishwasher. I didn't even know they were there. They weren't even mine but I still got yelled at for it. It's the stupidest little things, that you yell at me for. Do you want control? Are you trying to feel tough? You yell at me for having shoes and books scattered around my room, but I don't have time for that. I have homework that's more important. But you think everything I say is just an excuse and you say you don't want to hear it. Well guess what the time is going to come when you're not going to have the chance to hear it because I'll be gone. You'll wish you would have listened, but you won't be able to.
I know I'm just a disappointment, but I like to think that part of me isn't. That part of me deep down inside is better than that. But you make it so hard to believe that. You expect the world from me, but I don't have the world to give. You say I'm irresponsible, but I've been responible for things since I was thirteen. I'm twenty-one now, I just want a little less responibility and a little more fun.
I try not to show my feelings in front of you because when I do you always tell me I need to grow up. You make it seem like crying isn't okay and what I need to say isn't important. I'm sick of all of it. I can't keep what I'm feeling inside forever. But when I let it out you make me feel weak and stupid. Like I'm being a child, but feelings are natural. I shouldn't have to feel bad for that, but I do.
I shouldn't have to explain my life to you when you won't answer little questions but I do. I'm just so tired and sick of this. I'm done with everything. I'm done trying because I know I'm not perfect, nothing I do is ever right, I'm obviously just not good enough for you. I'm going to have to be okay with that, right now I'm not but maybe eventually I will be. Maybe someday it won't hurt so bad.
No comments:
Post a Comment