Matters of Life

There are so many unknowns in life. Many seem horrifying. I'm scared and this time it's not for my health. I hate not knowing what's going on. I hate being left out. I know you say everything will be okay but it doesn't feel okay. I hate living with unknowns. And I know I complain way too much, it's just I've been through so much. I've made it through, I'm trying so hard to be strong but it's all too much. I need answers and I know I won't get them. I'm trying so hard just to focus on school and forget everything else that is going on but I can't. I've debated going back to counseling but I don't want to use that as a crutch. I was doing so well out of counseling, I feel like going back would be a step backwards instead of forwards. I feel like I need to be strong and do this on my own. I'm just not sure if I can.